As I sit here nursing my blistered hands after a painfully long morning of leaf raking, it dawns on me that I am a casualty of the old order. I was a lucky child, surrounded by family; spending much time at my Grandparents house with my mother. Looking back, I did not know how I lucky I was and now truly miss it.
While I did not realize it at the time, I was spoiled by the old order of the world. Women used to be confined to the kitchen, venturing out to clean and act the part of an accessory on a man's arm. Women in my family were not "allowed" to do much outside of the box. We were not permitted to do any yardwork or seasonal chores (mowing, raking, shoveling, etc.). My personal favorite no-no (not really) -- we were not allowed to decorate for Christmas. No outdoor decorations, no putting up or decorating the tree....that was man's work. Yes, I am serious. I remember the first year my Mom & I put up a tree of our own...we had to call for help because we had no idea what to do.
I had a flashback of that moment today in my yard, while I cursed the lawn care guy under my breath for not showing up to miraculously make all signs of fall disappear from my outdoor space. I remember raking leaves into piles as a youngin' only to jump in them, destroying all order just minutes later. So essentially my only leaf raking experience is based off of fun and games. I guess that is why my neighbor finished his yard in twenty minutes, while I spent hours outside with that infuriating rake.
Until today, I always considered myself as a boundary pusher; an equal opportunity seeker. I still feel this way, but now I am tainted by my own boundaries created by the old order I grew up around. I never realized how many things I did not know how to do because of it. For example, to this day I still have no idea how to hang Christmas lights outside.
Through all of my ramblings, the point I am trying to get across is to not be afraid to push boundaries. No one can tell you that you cannot do anything for any reason. I do not care if you are male, female, black, white, or purple...we all have the same opportunities available to us. The only boundaries one should have are the ones we create for ourselves (and even some of those are questionable).
While I did not realize it at the time, I was spoiled by the old order of the world. Women used to be confined to the kitchen, venturing out to clean and act the part of an accessory on a man's arm. Women in my family were not "allowed" to do much outside of the box. We were not permitted to do any yardwork or seasonal chores (mowing, raking, shoveling, etc.). My personal favorite no-no (not really) -- we were not allowed to decorate for Christmas. No outdoor decorations, no putting up or decorating the tree....that was man's work. Yes, I am serious. I remember the first year my Mom & I put up a tree of our own...we had to call for help because we had no idea what to do.
I had a flashback of that moment today in my yard, while I cursed the lawn care guy under my breath for not showing up to miraculously make all signs of fall disappear from my outdoor space. I remember raking leaves into piles as a youngin' only to jump in them, destroying all order just minutes later. So essentially my only leaf raking experience is based off of fun and games. I guess that is why my neighbor finished his yard in twenty minutes, while I spent hours outside with that infuriating rake.
Until today, I always considered myself as a boundary pusher; an equal opportunity seeker. I still feel this way, but now I am tainted by my own boundaries created by the old order I grew up around. I never realized how many things I did not know how to do because of it. For example, to this day I still have no idea how to hang Christmas lights outside.
Through all of my ramblings, the point I am trying to get across is to not be afraid to push boundaries. No one can tell you that you cannot do anything for any reason. I do not care if you are male, female, black, white, or purple...we all have the same opportunities available to us. The only boundaries one should have are the ones we create for ourselves (and even some of those are questionable).
I am not telling you to go out and break every rule or law; in fact, I am discouraging it. I am a firm believer that laws are in place for a reason. However, there are situations in which you can push further than you think. You want a raise (and have done the work to earn one)? Ask for it. You want a date with that cute guy/girl you have been chatting up at Starbucks every morning? Ask for it. Seriously, what is the worst that can happen? They say no and you are no worse off than you were before you asked!
I realize how ridiculous this sounds...really, I do. I jump from old order barefoot and pregnant nonsense to ask for what you want out of life. I just cannot help but feel that if I would have pushed and demanded to do all of things I wanted to as a child, that maybe things would be different now. Would raking leaves or mowing the grass make my life better? No, probably not directly. But not being afraid to push the boundary and ask to do something that I always wanted to do...sure. Maybe I would have had more courage throughout my life if I would have pushed back then. It is all maybes, we will never really know...I just cannot help but wonder.
So this is long-winded me, trying to encourage you to seize every opportunity, push every boundary that you truly feel you should be able to cross and to always follow your instincts (Because really, has your gut lied to you yet? Probably not.) -- you owe it to yourself...and to the new order.
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